Your Ultimate Guide to Oral Sex

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Oral sex is easy if you're trying to kill time before the main event, like politely sitting through an opening act as you prep for the headliner. But why stick with average foreplay when you can turn an appetizer into an entree? (OK, we'll cool it with the metaphors.)

The point is, oral sex matters—and it matters to her that it's more than mediocre. According to research, 30 to 50 percent of women say they can't reach an orgasm through intercourse alone. So you've got some work to do, buddy.

Luckily, we're here to help—and so is Shanna Katz, M.Ed., a board-certified sexologist. Consider this your play-by-play on what she really craves when you’re making your way down south—and how to satisfy her desire every time.

Take Your Time
When it comes to cunnilingus, the following words should never leave your mouth: How long should I do it for? “Women tend to feel more insecure about having oral sex performed on them,” says Katz. So your main goal should be to take her off the clock. Explore each and every inch of her vulva and continually let her know how much you enjoy her body, Katz explains. Wait for her to pull you up.

Don’t Treat Her Clitoris Like a Bullseye
Just as the body needs to be warmed up for sex, the clitoris needs to be warmed up before it's stimulated, says Katz. So don't hit that area as soon as she drops her pants. Instead, tease her. Think of the vulva as a clock (with her clitoris being noon), and make your way around the entire clock, suggests Katz. Many women are especially sensitive between the areas of 2 and 3 o’clock, so that’s a good place to start, she says. And don’t forget to use your fingers. By incorporating both tongue and manual stimulation, you'll give her a variety of different sensations.

Vary Your Techniques
Ready to take her on a wild ride? Master these three positions from Katz’s new book, Oral Sex That’ll Blow Her Mind. (And for many more moves that'll shake up your sex life, chck out the 45 Best Sex Positions Every Couple Should Try.)

The Easy Chair
Lie on your back, keep your feet flat on the bed with your knees bent, and position a pillow underneath your neck and head for support. Have her lay on top of you (with her back touching your stomach), move her feet by your head, and rest her head on your bent knees.

Benefits: With your mouth right near her vulva, you'll have easy access to her most sensitive parts—and your hands will be free to do what they please.

Orgasmic Earmuffs
Both of you should lay on your sides, facing opposite directions. Have her support herself on a bent arm, then position yourself between her outstretched legs. As you rest your head on her thigh that’s closest to the bed, place her upper thigh over the top of your head, so both of your ears are covered by her legs.

Benefits: This position also gives you access to the entire vulva, and it's mighty comfortable, which means it's easy to maintain for long periods of time.

Forward Fold
As your partner stands in front of you, bend her over with her legs shoulder-width apart and have her place her hands around her ankles. Kneel behind her (add a pillow under your knees if needed) and help keep her stable by placing your hands on her hips.

Benefits: It’s a very easy position for you to hold, and it allows you to manually stimulate her clitoris.

How to ‘Marie Kondo’ your subscriptions with one click

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On Monday, Apple announced a new streaming video service that will allow users to subscribe to channels such as HBO and Showtime.

With Netflix, Hulu and Amazon providing their own subscription video services, some have speculated that consumers have reached “peak subscription,” while others have complained about the amount of money they are shelling out each month to keep up with the latest shows.

Does it spark joy?

People who feel overwhelmed with subscriptions can take the Marie Kondo route, said Kelsey Sheehy, NerdWallet’s personal-finance expert.

The Japanese professional organizer popularized her signature decluttering method, known as KonMari, with several books and a Netflix original series released in 2019.

Her cleaning tactics involve collecting all belongings in one place, then picking each one up and feeling whether it “sparks joy” before deciding whether to keep it.

Sheehy said this applies to digital clutter, too.

“In the same way Marie Kondo tells you to put all your clothes out so you can take stock of what you have, people can do this with subscriptions,” she said.

“Look at your monthly bank statements and determine what you are paying for.”

Sheehy said she did this herself recently and realized she was paying for Amazon’s Pantry subscription, which she had never used.

Many people underestimate how much they are spending on recurring monthly costs, according to a survey from Waterstone Management Group released in July 2018.

The average person thought they were paying $79.74 a month on subscriptions, when in reality the average monthly cost of various subscriptions runs at $111.61.

The average household watches 15 hours of streamed video per week on services like Netflix, Hulu and Amazon Prime Video, Deloitte’s 13th annual digital media trends survey found.

Apps make it easy

Some apps allow people to take a quick inventory of their subscriptions with the click of a button. Financial automation app Trim, which is free, lets users look at how much recurring subscriptions are costing them and then cancel with the click of a button.

Truebill, also free, works similarly, allowing users to log into subscription services after which the app will negotiate bills down or allow users to cancel them.

Outflow, another free subscription management app, lets users track what monthly costs they are paying and cancel them. Unlike TrueBill or Trim it does not negotiate with the companies a user is paying.

Trim and Truebill both reserve the right to share user data with third parties, while Outflow’s privacy policy states user data is not stored unless directly permitted. (Trim, Truebill and Outflow did not respond to request for comment.)

The old-fashioned route

“Sit down with the people in your household and a pad and pen and literally make a list of every subscription,” said Jim Kimble, founder and owner of the Cord Cutting Report, a publication for consumers looking to leave cable for other services.

“It may sound oversimplified, but it will make you realize there is a stark contrast between what you use every day versus what you are paying for just for the occasional show.”

Cancel after you watch your favorite show

Unlike many cable plans, Kimble said, most streaming services do not lock users into contracts. That means users can pay for an app just for one season of a show rather than spend money year round.

“Just because you watch 10 different streaming services in a year doesn’t mean you need to pay for them all at once,” he said.

Share accounts with family or friends?

Others mooch off their friends or family’s accounts, which is ethically questionable. This can save hundreds of dollars over the years, according to a January study from CordCutting.com.

It found the average person who uses a Netflix account without paying for it will do so for 26 months.

Netflix’s official policy is that users should not share passwords. At a base subscription price of $8.99 per month for Netflix, this means the average mooching user saves $233 before they finally start paying for their own content.

Executives at most streaming companies are aware that users share passwords and do not appear to be cracking down any time soon.

Sharing passwords is technically a crime, but Netflix CEO Reed Hastings said in 2016, “We love people sharing Netflix,” adding that people who mooch the service often become paying subscribers later.

5 Crazy Ways Hot Women Trick You

Time flies when you’re babbling with babes. After talking with a woman, men estimated the conversation to be nearly 3.5 minutes briefer if she was attractive, according to a Canadian study. Guys also recalled more discussion topics if they spoke with a hottie. 

Because you’re trying to make a good impression, you focus more on both the conversation and your own words when chatting with a beautiful woman, explains study coauthor Ping Dong, a doctoral researcher at Toronto’s Rotman School of Management. And because your brain is more engaged, time tends to slip by without you noticing it, Dong adds. 

But that's not the only way hot women mess with your mind:

They scramble your memory. After lying to impress a gorgeous girl, men had a harder time separating the truth from their fiction a few weeks later. Turns out, being dishonest with a potential sexual partner actually confuses your memory about the truth, finds a recent study from Texas Christian University. And the more you lie, the more your brain starts to accept those fibs as fact, the study authors say. (Sharpen your memory with these 7 Weird Brain Tricks That Make You Smarter.) 

They make you impatient. Guys were more likely to accept crappy mortgage terms if a loan ad featured a beautiful woman. Men also opted for a smaller, short-term payout as opposed to more cash down the road after looking at sexy ladies. By stoking the reward centers of your brain, hot women cause you to discount the future and focus on immediate gratification, according to reports from McMaster University and the National Bureau of Economic Research. 

They turn you into Robin Hood. Men are more likely to act selflessly and give money to the poor when attractive women are watching, shows a study from the U.K. The prospect of sex causes men to show off their altruistic side, which women find appealing, the authors explain. (But here's a bonus: Giving back is one of the many ways you can Use Science to Be More Attractive to Women.) 

They give you a high. In a study at the University of Texas, guys experienced a drug-like buzz after viewing photos of hourglass-shaped female butts and hips. The right waist-to-hip ratio is a serious sign of reproductive potential, which sends a pleasure-packed jolt through the reward centers of a man’s brain, the researchers say.

The #1 Reason to Be Thankful Today: SI Swimsuit Issue Reveal!

And now, a quick power ranking of the best things a man can wake up to in the morning:

5. A blizzard outside (no work!)
4. Total peace and quiet
3. Bacon and eggs in bed
2. Morning sex
1. The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover reveal.

Ah yes, the vaunted swimsuit cover unveiling is an A.M. tradition like no other. Our friends at SI just revealed this year's cover, which features the stunning model Hannah Davis (almost) baring it all on a Tennessee farm:

Never have we so badly wanted to take a trip down south. Davis told SI that she never thought she'd get the cover, since the magazine tends to put beach photos front and center. (Remember last year's tantalizing trifecta?) But we're thankful SI went rural for 2015, and now we can't wait to get our paws on the whole issue, which hits newsstands next Tuesday, February 10th.

Until then, check out our own gallery of beautiful babes and scroll through The Hottest Women of All Time.

The 5 Worst Sex Positions Ever

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Has your whole sex life been a lie? We surveyed over 1,200 Women’s Health readers about their least favorite sex positions, and you won’t like the results: Women rated common moves like doggy style, reverse cowgirl, and 69 as the worst sex positions.

Chances are, those sex staples have been in your arsenal since you bought your first condom.

Men have long relied on standard moves like missionary because they’re easy, efficient, and feel great—but as it turns out, women have quietly been cursing them the whole time.

To pinpoint the source of female frustration, we consulted with top experts to uncover why your five favorite positions just aren’t cutting it—and the upgrades you must make to satisfy her sex drive. 

Related: How to Pleasure a Woman—the Men’s Health Guide to Becoming a Master Lover

1. Doggy Style

Why she’s not into it: Put simply, it’s too painful. “The issue here is you may be ramming her cervix, which is why deep penetration is often more harmful than hot,” says Sara Gottfried, M.D., OB/GYN, author of The Hormone Cure.

Plus, if you’re fully removing yourself, then re-entering her, it often hurts her chances at staying fully lubricated, Dr. Gottfried explains. (Check out this lube if you’re looking for one that will work for both of you.)

Women in our survey also said doggy’s not intimate enough. Even though rough sex can be awesome if you’re both into it, most women are looking for more of a connection during sex, Dr. Gottfried says.

While you may have a blast admiring her assets when she’s on all fours, her view of the bed isn’t nearly as stimulating.

Related: 20 Women Reveal What They Secretly Want In Bed

How to fix it: To prevent the bump and grind from getting painful, keep your thrusts short and shallow, rather than deep and fast.

Shallow thrusts will stimulate the front third of her vagina, which is the most sensitive part, says Rebecca Rosenblat, a sex therapist and the author of Seducing Your Man.

Up the intimacy factor by running your hands through her hair, down her spine, and occasionally leaning forward to kiss and suck on her neck.

And don’t forget the clitoral stimulation, Dr. Gottfried advises. Just because you’re focusing on her backside, doesn’t mean you should neglect her most sensitive spots.

Related: 13 Things You Should Be Doing to Her Clitoris

2. Woman on Top

Why she’s not into it: One word: insecurity. According to our survey, a majority of women feel more self-conscious when they’re on top.

Dr. Gottfried says women often worry about what their stomachs or breasts look like from where you’re laying. And even though you think she looks like a rock star, even the tiniest shred of doubt can put out her fire.

How to fix it: Switch into a side-by-side position like “The Spork.” Have her lie on her back, and raise her right leg.

Slot yourself between her legs at a 90-degree angle and ease inside her. This way, her legs will form the tines of a spork utensil. (Check out 45 Best Sex Positions Every Man Should Try.)

3. Reverse Cowgirl

Why she’s not into it: Because it’s hard for her to climax like that—and not everything fits when she’s riding in reverse.

“Reverse cowgirl may seem sexy and adventurous, but when you actually try to enter her, things might not fit the way you think that they should,” says Jen Landa, M.D., Chief Medical Officer of BodyLogicMD and author of The Sex Drive Solution for Women.

It often boils down to the curvature of your penis not coinciding with the angle of her vagina, Dr. Landa says. Realistically, any time you bend your penis too far at the base, it’s not only uncomfortable for her, it becomes dangerous for you.

In other words, you can break your junk.

Related: The 10 Worst Things That Can Happen to Your Penis

How to fix it: If you’re in it for the view, switch to doggy. The fit’s more practical, and you can help her reach orgasm, says Dr. Landa.

But if you still want the naughtiness factor, put the doggy to bed. Do this: Stand up, have her bend forward, place her hands on a stable mirror, then enter her from behind.

You’ll still be able to manually stimulate her, but now you can both use the mirror to your advantage.