Oral Sex Mistakes Men Make

Lisa Kleypas of Sugar Daddy is quoted, by GoodReads, as saying, “A sixty-eight, he wants you to go down on him but he won’t return the favor. It would be sixty-nine but he owes you one.” Kleypas is actually, so freaking right. So many times women are left on their backs, on their sides, on their stomaches with their butts poked up into the air, yearning for more. Yearning for an orgasm that will never come. And there are really a bevy of oral sex mistakes that men make on a daily basis, really, without even knowing. So today we are starting the conversation and hopefully preventing a lot of women from yearning anymore than they have to.

Too high. Here’s the thing about the clitoris. You can aim too high or too low so easily you won’t even notice it until you’ve been submerged in her downstairs region for almost two hours and you still.. cannot figure out why she.. hasn’t orgasmed. So when it comes to aim...

Aim. When you aim, make an informed aim. Having an understanding of the vagina — where things are, what parts do what, what parts feel good when you touch them — then oral sex suddenly becomes less a game of Operation (aka just trying to wing it) and more of a game of Battleship (aka using your knowledge to sink your player’s battleship, aka make her orgasm).

Ex. When it comes to your new girl, all bets are off as far as your old girl was concerned. Vaginas are more like snowflakes then they are like flowers. See, a field full of daisies look the same and pretty much are the same, and when a bee uses them to pollinate, it’s always done the same way. But vaginas...

Look. They might all look the same, feel the same to the naked eye (or finger.. rather), and have the same parts… they do not all work the same. What stimulates one woman may do absolutely nothing for another, or worse it actually may turn her off completely. So be careful how you tread.

Delicate. There is a narrative in our society that women are delicate little flowers that can not be dealt with too roughly or harshly. This is simply not true. Is a woman’s clitoris very, very sensitive? Abso-freaking-lutely. Does that mean you have to be so delicate and light and tender when approaching her?Not specifically. Sometimes being too light won’t stimulate her at all, but a delicate flick of the tongue could send her over the edge.

Switch it up. If something is going really well, and your girl is writhing on the edge of orgasm… why would you suddenly switch up what you’re doing? If you see her responding positively to what it is that you’re doing, keep at it. Don’t just suddenly switch everything up, but on the flip side...

Steady. Sure, slow and steady wins the race, but slow and steady doesn’t win the race if you’ve been doing the same thing for 45 straight minutes and she hasn’t even moaned out once. You clearly aren’t doing the right combination of motions to get her off, so knowing when to switch it up and when to keep at it is a really great skill to have.

Eyes. There’s nothing like seeing a look of pure fear in someone’s eyes as their mouth is clamped down around your vagina, to be honest. It does nothing but instill fear right back into the vagina owner. Keep it sexy in the eyes, even when you don’t know what the actual hell you’re doing. The power of a good, hard stare is severely underrated.

Teeth. The old saying is tits and teeth, tits and teeth. This isn’t fully true when it comes to oral sex on a woman. But again, it really depends on who you’re with. We’d tend to say that for the most part, teeth is an absolute no-no. So keep those choppers in your mouth, guys. But tits...

Stimulation. You have two hands, right? Why not use them to the best of your ability. Let’s talk tits first. You can use your hands to reach up and caress them, grab them, stroke them, tweak the nipples — you have a decent range of motion from down below. But you can also use your arms to touch other parts of her body and amplify the oral pressure. Don’t just use your mouth.

Rush. The train isn’t going to come any quicker if you are racing toward the tracks at full speed. The train will come when scheduled, regardless of how fast you get to the terminal, so to speak. Does this make sense or is this nonsensical? Forget the metaphors. You can’t rush someone toward climax. It is going to happen at its own speed. And women can tell when you’re trying to push them over the edge without putting in the time.

Figured out. You could be having sex with the same woman for 1,000 years and you still will never have her fully figured out sexually. That’s because there are numerous ways you can perform oral sex on someone. So when it comes to what you already know, don’t be afraid to toss it out the window. You can’t be afraid to take chances, try new things, because they’ll all result in her feeling really good.

Foreplay. A little kissing, a little bit of light or heavy petting… you can’t just race down to the oven without preheating the damn thing. And even when it comes to oral, there’s preheating to be done before the orgasm. Utilize every component of her, not just the clitoris. The vagina is not just the clitoris, so don’t treat the clitoris like the star when the vagina is really an ensemble cast.

Direct. There are.. honestly a sh*t ton of nerve endings in the clitoris. To suck it into your mouth full speed right off the bat won’t send a lot of women over the edge, but may send you to the hospital with a broken nose from the bucking of their pelvises. Be careful to treat the clitoris like what it is.. a clitoris.. not an easy button for the orgasm.

You. We’re curious about what kind of oral sex mistakes you’ve encountered throughout your years. Have you ever experienced any of the above oral sex mistakes? Have any that we didn’t include? We’re wide open to suggestions, so let us know what you think in the comments section below. We’re not here to judge, just curious.